When you are in a long-distance relationship with a military, holding onto it can get difficult at times. There are way too many stories of military relationships breaking apart due to various reasons.
If you are dating a military man over a long-distance or planning to date one, chances are that you are looking for advice on how to make it successful and that’s why you are here.
While it’s exciting to date an army guy, it also comes with its own set of problems. The raining schedules, limited communications opportunities, and deployments are some of the challenges that you will have to face.
Tips For Dating A Military Man Over Long Distance Relationship
No military man wants to find out that their partner is cheating on them when they are out there serving for their country.
Plan Your Calls
You know when you will get a call from him and you have kept aside some time to talk to him but keep in mind that not every conversation is going to be smooth sailing.
But if you are living your lives and having your own set of problems, but when you are calling him do not forget about your problems. Whenever you need him, share your problems and take his advice. Even he is part of your life, right?
Even though he is thousands of miles away he will be willing to help you in any way possible. Whether you are talking of phone call or FaceTime, having open communication is the key to a successful relationship. Just remember not to be a nagging partner.
Another tip is to make use of social media to be in touch with him. Social websites like Instagram and Snapchat makes it possible to be in contact with your partner throughout the day.
Way Of Communication
Before your man is sent on deployment, you need to talk to him and be clear about how often you will be able to be in contact.
There may be situations where he won’t have access to the internet or the way to contact you is only via satellite phone. Such things should be discussed so that you can set realistic expectations.
Once you have figured out how and when you are going to be in contact, the next thing is to find out the way of communication that works best for both you and him. This is because every couple is different. While some prefer FaceTime, other couples prefer to talk over the phone.
It is very important to be clear about this because the needs may change often depending on his deployment.
Think About How To Communicate
How you talk to him is more important than how much you talk to him so start thinking about what you are going to communicate with him.
Different couples communicate in different ways. Some send poems, some send letters, and some even share pictures that mean a lot to them. So you need to find out what resonates with your partner and relate to him.
Some couples don’t find such things meanings and talk in a normal way and there is nothing wrong with this. As long as you both are comfortable with each other it doesn’t matter. For example, sending a photo of him enjoying the beach might make him miss his home so it’s better to talk about his work or what’s going on with you.
Don’t Forget To Socialize
I can understand that you haven’t talked to him for days, you are missing him and there are a lot of things that you want to share with him.
You get really frustrated but that doesn’t mean you have to hibernate yourself from the rest of the world. Talk to your old friends, make new friends, and create a lot of memories with them.
Don’t forget that socializing is also an important part of your life. Go on trips, parties, and do whatever you can to enjoy your life.
Connect With His Friends & Family
Use the time during his deployment to connect with his parents, friends, and other family members since they also become a part of your relationship.
These are the people who will become your support network when your military boyfriend is in deployment. Also, his parents and other close members become like your second family to support you when he is not with you. This gets much easier if your boyfriend and you are from the same town.
If they are far away from you, try to be in touch with them through phone calls. It will show them that you care about them. You can even try to visit them once every 2 or 3 months.
Celebrate Everything With Him
Make it a habit of celebrating every holiday even if your military boyfriend is far away from you. Send him personalized greeting cards, wishes, and make him feel like he is a part of the holiday.
Find Goals That You Can Work Together
Find and discuss things that both of you can do together when he is on deployment. For example, if you have a debt that you want to pay off, talk about it every 2 to 3 weeks and look at your bank accounts to see where you can save money.
Such things will give you something to talk about and also do things together even if he is miles away from you. This will also help in strengthening your bond.
Play Fun Games
Military people use a lot of coded messages when talking to each other. Why not turn this into a game have some fun. Let him send you some fun messages for you to decode. This will help you learn a few things about the military.
It Will Make You Better Communicator
Couples who are in a long-distance relationship are said to communicate more deep and meaningful. Since communication is the most important part of a relationship, make use of this time to improve your communication skills.
Know It Will Get Better
The first few months are said to be the most difficult in a long-distance relationship. This is usually the first four months and after six to eight months it will get easier for you. So, if you are going through the initial rough patch, know that it will get better in the coming days.
Know It’s Not Perfect
When you are not spending much time together, you tend to idealize your partner for being a perfect human being. But as you spend time in your long-distance relationship you will find some quirks and habits about your partner that might not go well with you.
You may get disappointed when you learn that your partner is not as perfect as you thought. Understand that no relationship or human being is perfect and try to find beauty in those imperfections.
Be Aware Of Military Challenges
The military may not be as welcoming to you as you might expect unless you are married to him. They don’t take girlfriends seriously. Make sure you know about the obstacles and challenges that you might have to face.
For example, if you are not yet married you can’t visit him at the base and have to stay in a hotel. Your communication over phone or video will also be limited. And if he is on a ship, you will have to wait for a long time to even get a call from him.
By understanding such challenges, you will be better prepared to handle them and won’t put any additional stress on yourself.
Keep Your Love Above All
Always keep your love at the center of your relationship. Have patience and be strong to face the challenges.
Even if communication with him is limited or his deployment gets extended or even your visitation gets canceled, understand that all of them are part of military life.
Be kind and give him your full support since such challenges are not easy for him too. The more you stress about such things, the more stressful it will be for him.
And above everything else, understand that you have each other back to help and support during tough times even when you are thousands of miles apart.
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